1) You look tired, are you sleeping? You better sleep before baby comes!

2) Wow you’ve gotten huge since I last saw you!

3) Are you sure you’re eating enough?

4) Are you sure you aren’t eating too much?

5) I was “x amount of days” late. As a first time mom you’ll probably be at least a week late too…

6) Huh, that shirt really makes you look……………pregnant.

7) Let me tell you my labor (horror) story.

8) Just you wait, it’s going to get soooo much worse (usually followed by an unpleasant smile).

9) Wait, you seriously don’t have a theme for your nursery?

10) Haven’t you had enough cake?

Things you SHOULD say to a pregnant woman:

1) More cake?

2) See #1